As unlikely as it may seem, at some point during these wild years I became a Christian. Not just once, but many times, because I kept swinging back and forth between opposing poles. Every time I turned to God, the lure of fame, fortune, women and beer got the better of me. Every time I got myself into trouble with any of the above, I ran back to God, and somehow I sensed that the moral values of these two opposing poles were incompatible. When I was on stage, I momentarily forgot about these inner battles, but when I was alone at home, they played tug of war inside me.
During this time of inner conflict I met a wonderful young lady, and we got married. I really believed that our marriage would make me settle down, but it didn’t. One often hears the expression ‘It takes two to tango’, but in our case it was different. Despite all my pathetic self-justifications I knew very well that I was the rotten apple, not she. I was the one who wasn’t prepared to give up my illustrious life style, not even after our sons Stefan and Christian were born. I tried hard to be a good dad, I really did, but somehow I always managed to screw it up with my erratic behavior. I don’t know how my wife could have put up with me for so long, but eventually she simply cracked and left me. Well done, Mr. Wonderboy!
Then the lights went out.